Psalm 62: “In you alone is my soul at rest. My help comes from you.”

Fr. Lawrence Jenco was held hostage in Lebanon for over 560 days. After being released he returned to an active ministry and died a few years later of cancer. An experience such as his -- and others -- makes it difficult to throw around a flip phrase like “forgive and forget.” The phrase does have some application, undeniably, in those minor irritations we all run into. Why not forgive and try to forget rather than carry around all that unnecessary baggage?

He wrote after his release and his reentry into normal life that he could forgive his captors. How do you forgive someone who has arbitrarily taken your freedom away and confined you in a little cell for that length of time? That makes quarantine look like a three day retreat. Others have forgiven those who maligned them and attempted to destroy their reputation by false charges. Jenco apparently believed it was possible to forgive and did so himself.

But, he said, it is not so easy or maybe even possible to forget the experience. It might be possible to forget the smaller things but 560 days of unjust imprisonment....? Couples whose marriage of twenty years is on the breaking point cannot simply forget twenty years of shared joy, grief and ordinary life. It's a bit like the trust and hope we put in Christ at the death of a loved one; it might enable us to sing hymns of joy and trust but it cannot make us quickly forget all the person meant to us. Or that he/she is gone.

Part of the seasoning of our soul is the acceptance into ourselves of unforgettable elements in our experience. We hope that with time and faith we see more clearly what value there is in those years of grief or joy. Or those months in quarantine or separation.

Psalm 27: “I believe I shall see the Lord’s goodness / in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord; be strong; / be stouthearted, and wait for the Lord!”

Reply to Fr. Don at: DTalafous@csbsju.edu

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